Breaking to Grow

So emotionally, I have just been on this roller coaster. Mixed emotions about coming to the end of my trip. Am I ready to go back home? No, because I don't want to stop what I am doing. But I miss family and other important people. Among all of these emotions, I have also been trying to figure out what I am supposed to do with my life. Like most college students.  After talking my bestest friend ever that probably knows me better than myself, I have come to the conclusion that I am going to have to work really really hard in the near future. This is a new concept to me; I've learned the meaning of a hard day's work since I have been Oklahoma.

I realized through talking it all out, that I am looking for the easy way out in everything; financially, academically, but that is not what I am called to do. I know I am supposed to be a teacher. And I am still supposed to be in school. As hard as it is going to be, I know for me to better be able to serve God and spread the word of His son, I have to deny my flesh to do what I need to do for Him. No matter how hard it is and how long it takes.

It's really scary, but in some weird way, I now have peace about everything. I know that if I work to the best of my ability, all will work out for the will of God. I'm expecting hardships, and preparing myself for the challenge that is to come, with a knowledge that I have the best person on my side. GOD! Romans 8:31 says

What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

Not sure about your Bible but in mine, it is under "More than Conquerors." How exciting! Find freedom in knowing that no matter what you are going through or facing, that God is on your side and He loves you tons and tons! He sent His perfect Son to die for our imperfect human lives! How awesome is that? You can't tell me that knowing that does not bring a smile to your face. Remember that and cling to it, just as I am. It's not going to be easy, but at the end of it all you will see that there is a plan. A plan that is made just for you! 

I am seeing that more and more as I serve here. The other night, I worked the graveyard shift eleven to seven.  And it was totally quiet, and boring. I had no contact with the ladies that I serve and it was not the most fun thing in the world. Anyways, as I was doing the labor of the night shift, I found myself stocking paper cups, straws, and napkins. Things I learned how to properly stock by working at McDonald's for a summer, a Christmas, a Spring Break, and an Easter Break. Okay, so that is a silly example, but I was able to adequately do that because of what I was taught a long time ago. 

There is a plan for every step I take and there is a plan for every step you take. You may not see it now, but one day you will be doing something ever so simple and somehow it will just click and you'll say something like "That's why that happened" or "I get it now. Thank you God for allowing me to learn that, even if it was the hard way."  I don't really know what you will say, but that's what I said. 

Tonight while I was talking with my bestest friend ever, I had forgotten that I had given everything to God a long time ago, but for some reason was trying to take it all back and fix it myself. Basically, what I discovered is that I can't fix it without His help and a slowly but surely realized that I needed to give it all back to Him. Which is what I am doing right now as I write this post. 

I had to break down and cry to remember that God has the "whole world in His hand," just to remember that I am a part of the world that He holds. Freedom came! Praise God! And I hope you can remember that you are a part of that world too. The world that He holds in His hands, not the world you try to hold on your shoulders as it rolls down your back. 

Often we recite to the ladies Jeremiah 29:11, but I had forgotten that it applies to me too. I may not be getting physically hurt or attacked, but Satan is throwing his darts at me daily as I do my best to dodge them. Find freedom in being broken and remembering that God is still around you. 

amgfinding_freedom 

Lotion Moments

So I have this friend in my life! Her name is Kayla Marie. She is a totally awesome photographer and I miss her dearly. Eventually she will read this and hopefully will smile.  Kayla sent me this package and enclosed was a small tub of my favorite Bath and Body Works scent lotion. I promise there is a point to this story, just hang tight.

Along with the lotion, she told me a story. A teacher of hers in high school used lotion. Every time she did, she would say a quick prayer or just praise God in that moment. She called them her lotion moments. Now that I have heard this story, I have began doing the same.

Find freedom in doing something simple where you don't have to focus on the task at hand, but rather be able to talk to your Creator for a moment. He loves that! Sorry guys, I don't really know what you could do, but I'm sure you are creative enough to come up with something on your own.

Super short and to the point! Quick prayer request and you can go figure out how to have "lotion" moments.

• Gabby has a job interview at 9:40 tomorrow morning and would greatly appreciate prayers during and after. 
• My team and I are experiencing little bit of sickness, not too bad, but enough to bring down energy levels. 
• I am working the eleven to seven the next two nights so if you would pray for strength through the evening, that would be great. 
• My team as we embrace these next three weeks of serving Christ as we serve these women. 

amgfinding_freedom

Changement d'attitude

So I just got done preparing my Sunday school lesson for the women tomorrow! It's about Ruth and three characteristics we can learn from her. Super excited, mostly because I am talking about one of my favorite Bible characters. Now that my lesson is done, I thought I would share with you some of what has been going on in my crazy, wonderful Oklahoma life.

God has opened so many doors for me to talk with the women about Him. I absolutely love these opportunities. Sarah, I've talked about her before in my blog, is going through a lot right now with her family; she gets excited over the smallest things that God delivers her. Often she is in the chapel by herself or with somebody else just listening to Laura Story or Jeremy Camp's wife. Sometimes she listens to the Bible on CD. Other times she is just in there praying. When we aren't crazy busy at the shelter, I try to go in there for a moment or two and just talk with her. She tells me of her heartache for her family and how she is praying for them to find God just as she has. Then there are days she just tells me what she is learning in the Bible. Right now she is going through the book of Judges and I quote "Those people did not listen to God." Her desire is to be obedient and live for Christ. It's so inspiring to me!

Um...let's see. The fourth of July picnic at Tulsa Park went very well. At first, I was not looking forward to it because all I could see was hot, sunburn, and feeling disgustingly sweaty. It wasn't like that at all. Yes, it was hot, but it didn't matter. I was able to see the women in a different light. They were able to have fun with their families and enjoy time away from the shelter. I've never had more fun sitting on a thin sheet on the ground talking with people than I did that day. The fireworks were beautiful and by the end of the night, all the women and children were ready to go to sleep. One child even fell asleep during the fireworks.

The past few nights have been pretty peaceful. Last night I made Mexican rice. I was rather worried because a)it is rice b)I've never cooked rice for four much less fifty and c)did I mention I have never made rice before. At first it looked like a big mess that was not going to work out, but thankfully, it worked out and the women enjoyed it.

It's amazing how God can change a person's heart. I have been praying specifically for patience with one particular lady. She easily can get under my skin if I let her. But last night, I saw a different side of her, and I was able to understand more than what was at the surface. I and my teammate were able to tell her that she was not stupid and that God has a plan for her even though she may not be able to see it right now. It was a completely beautiful moment and I am so thankful God allowed me to be a part of it.

Don't really have a "find freedom" moment for you guys; except maybe find freedom in knowing God's changing your heart and attitude for the better if you allow Him.

Prayer Request and then you can continue on your daily lives.

• A guest's baby is in the hospital.
• My mom's cousin has been diagnosed for the second time with cancer. 
• My Sunday school lesson with the ladies tomorrow. 
• That God will continue to open doors for me and my team to share the love He has in the next 26-28 days (We all aren't leaving on the same day)